And a Side of Fail

My family was enjoying a nice Christmas (for us!) weekend, so my playtime was limited to an hour or so before bed this weekend.  Nonetheless, Saturday night, I got an invite to 10-man ToC from a guild-mate looking to complete the dungeon on his alt.  He had kindly put together a group already, and all I had to do was put on my game face and accept a summon — woot-eh!

I arrive to find myself and a druid are the healing team, and two paladin tanks will be protecting us from the baddies.  People immediately spaz about two healers — I have two-healed it with a paladin before, but no worries — the ret pally offers to switch to heals if its needed.

Round 1

We engage the boss, I’m on tank 1 and raid, and the tree has tank 2 and raid.  I do my normal: riptide, earth shield, chain heal the melee.  Everything seems to be going ok until tank 2 has to taunt.  Immediately I’m noticing a sizeable *squish*  Not knowing whether it’s a lack of concentrated heals from the druid, or a lack of skill on the part of the tank, I keep my mouth shut, switch over, and start spamming tank 2 like he’s mine.

Beast 1 dies, and on come the worms.  Tank 1 takes the stationary target (yes, I really don’t feel like looking up the names) while tank 2 takes the kite job.  Immediately on grabbing aggro, tank 2 turns the worm face first into the raid and proceeds to sit there… and sit there.  Raid leader yells at him to turn it away from the raid (raiding 101 — mobs do not face the raid) and he shows he can follow instructions *yay*

Then the bad news occurs — my tree friend gets the poison debuff.  Tank 2, now endowed with fire, is standing in a giant puddle of concentric green rings, and the druid is trying to decide whether to chance green death eating him alive, or green death on the floor.  His indecision is costly, and he summarily dies, leaving my solo healing for about oh…. 10 seconds.  During that time the cry begins “WTF, where are my heals!!!”  My blood pressure promptly goes up 5k points.  We die, I’m a jerk about the whole “telling healers to heal” thing, and we go back in for….

Round 2

Our ret pally takes the plunge and switches to holy.  Resto tree is relegated to raid, while I remain on Tank 1, and the now-christened holy pally is on tank 2.  No problem, this will be great!  Beast #1 goes down fairly well, although I’m still having to switch to tank 2 on his taunt.

Worms arrive.  Tank 2 picks up his target — I’m stationed to heal tank 1, and as tank 2 kites around I lose him a bit.  “No problem,” I think…. oh, but it is.  Tank 2 is squishing so hard I think he doesn’t have a healer — maybe that paladin confused his assignments.  I gradually center myself up, and get the fire buff/debuff.  Tank 2 is poisoned.  I’m about halfway to him, so I throw a tide on myself and jog over to de-poison him.  I’m promptly yelled at to de-poison him *facepalm*

Poison death to the tank averted AND… I die.  Apparently I don’t need any healing while I run, and riptide was just not quite enough to keep me up.  Tree dies, and holy pally keeps up two tanks for longer than I expected.

Round 3

At this point I’m talking to the raid leader going, “I honestly don’t know what the problem is but I’m running out of mana faster than I should be for 3 healers on this fight — what are the other healers doing?”  He sends me the recount data (just raw hps) and I’m looking at:

1. Pally: 3.0 hps

2. Windsoar: 3.2 hps

3. Resto: 2.7 hps

Ok, I’m looking at enough raw healing power to get us through even an idiot stick moment, right?

Engage, kill beast #1, worms again — tank 2 forgets to kite again.  Resto and I get the poison debuff, look at the 4 green rings on the floor that the tank is standing in *shrug, deathwish, run*  I’m asking the tank in vent to kite as we’re jogging over, but he’s obviously on disconnect as he loops the worm in a circle–towards the raid–and remains in the green circle of death.  *Garrrrr*

Death, 5 raid members leave, and hey, look, we’ve got a group for 5-man ToC!

Knowing that at least one of my guildies probably needs gear from there, and I have a good 20 minutes till bedtime still, we soldier on over to ToC with tank #2, a melee and two ranged dps and little ol’ me.

Heroic ToC

Mounted combat breezes by to be followed by the 3 champion fight.  Things are O.K. but the tank is awfully squishy for someone geared for ToC-raid.  The warrior dps has hate for over half the fight, and while I think I did a heroic job of keeping him up, when he got all three bosses at one point–he kinda squished.  Knowing the warrior dps is a tank as his main I’m starting to slowly categorize tank #2 as possibly undergeared.

3-champs die, adds come out, and we engage two, yes, two groups.  There are enemy light-wells giving a hell of a fireworks display, and I crater trying to kite a monk back to the tank.  I am now beyond annoyed.  We get back to the dungeon, and I inspect tank #2…. and I see why he’s #2, and really should be “do not tank ever, ever, ever.”  His gear is itemized between mitigation, stamina, and AP… not threat, not strength, but attack power.  He chose to take mana saving talents over, oh I don’t know, 5% parry.

The hilarity continues as we get the Confessor, who promptly halos me in flames of holy fire for most of the fight, as tank #2 tries to keep aggro on the shade.  For the most part he fails, and my healing efforts are wholly dedicated to keeping myself alive and the warrior dps (tank, who is not a tank, oh yes) alive.

I would like to say that we lived.  However, we had at least one more wipe before the night was over.  However, if you have a geared enough plate wearer with occasional help from an actual tank, then it is possible to faceroll ToC… for future reference.

Oh Ye of Little Faith

I’m just gonna finish up this night of fail by saying–now I understand why PuG leaders want gearscores and achievement linkage.  It honestly won’t tell you if someone is a flaming idiot who doesn’t understand how to spec, gem or move a raid boss when necessary–but it does seem to lend some credence and reliability to the “total stranger may cost me 100g in repairs tonight–how can I minimize that?”

I have always been one of those people who is almost mortally offended when I find people inspecting my gear or talents, and then sending me messages about how I did or did not do a good job with said things.  I almost never inspect another players unless invited to–unless there is some problem.  Saturday also gave me that confidence that, yes, I can tell whether a tank is squishing due to healers or because they suck.  I had niggling doubts about his viability on Round 1, but it wasn’t until ToC inspect that I really allowed myself to believe that a tank that squishy would have volunteered to tank content he/she is not viable for.

You can always learn something new from a pug–whether it’s worth 100g or not… well… we’ll save that one for another day.


4 thoughts on “And a Side of Fail

  1. Not to confess my uber-geek-dom but that sounds like a dream I once had. I'm sorry you had such a terrible experience, but like you've always said. "You learn the most from pugs". Now you have to choke on your own words. 😛

    Next time call me, my new axe upped my dps about 400. 🙂 🙂 🙂

    • Well, what's the best I can do? Leave or stay & suffer. I tend to fall to the latter when guildies are involved in any case, and the stories are funny (sometimes) later.

Comments are closed.