Farking Icehole

Ever log into the game to be surrounded by your least favorite people:

  • The gal who tells everyone her cup size
  • The guy who leaves raids whenever they’re not going his way
  • The kid who asks everyone to duel him
  • The know everything who comments on everyone’s stats, gear & talents, and how they’re doing it wrong *Not like this person is familiar, no way, no how*
  • The boaster who can not only do the best possible job in his own role, but can also do your job while learning Swahili and feeding hungry orphans

There’s a multitude of ways that you can choose to react and interact with such people.  However, these are my favorite five, in no particular order of importance.

Get ’em Canned

You like love the guild that you’re attached to, but some days this niggling annoyance of a–let’s call them a person shall we?–ruins the mood every time you see their name in green.

Luckily for you, the fact that they are such an obnoxious twit makes you a valued member without lifting a pinkie finger, while they actually have to, ya know, be good and stuff.  However, even the best players will have off days/nights, and you just need to be open to capitalizing on those off-days in order to wave a fond adieu to your least favorite person.

Step One: Don’t suck.  If you suck, then you can’t very well complain, now can you?*

*Backup to not sucking is to swindle a good player to help you with your dastardly plan to remove the annoyance.

Step Two: Keep track of your foes suckiness.

Step Three: Report to Higher Authorities (or in council meetings if you’re an officer)

Step Four: Wait for the “talk.”  Higher Authorities will often try to chat through problems before kicking an annoyance.  Sometimes, this is enough to make the offender leave the guild in disgust.  Especially true for braggarts.

Step Five: If you have access to what the “talk” was about, just wait for a relapse and report it again.  This should put you well on the way to having the person removed.

Step Six: Him or Me.  If you’re really an asset to your team, you might be able to go to your Higher Authorities in tears over the annoyance and state that the problem is causing you to leave the guild.

Notes & Tips: Don’t be annoying.  Don’t be rude and vengeful.  If you treat it as a “problem” facing the guild instead of a personal attack, you’re much more likely to have success.

Ignore ‘Em

Nothing beats the blessed silence that ensues when you have someone muted in Ventrillo and /ignored in-game.

While most guilds frown on ignoring fellow members, there’s often not a firm rule against the practice.  Be sure to discuss with a Higher Authority so that you’re not missing vital information come raid time; however, if you explain that this is the only way for you to function as a sane competent member of the raid team, most officers will let it slide.

Can also be a great tactic in the Can ‘Em Campaign.

The Discussion

Sometimes people fail to know that there’s a line in social discourse or behavior.  That’s when you come in with your vaunted knowledge base of proper etiquette and rules to play nice by.

Step One: Have a private conversation with the person in question letting them know you find their behavior/discussion inappropriate.

Step Two: If the feedback is good, just let things percolate.  If the conversation starts in the sewers and goes down from there, report it to the Higher Authorities.  While there likely won’t be any action taken, at least you seem like a reasonable human being trying to take care of a personal issue in a grown-up way.

Step Three: Make it public.  Higher Authorities hate public tiffs–more than dying in fire, more than opening the guild bank for repairs, more than missing a raid to visit their grandmother–drama is the stuff of nightmares.

If/when you make any issue within the guild part of the public domain, remember, you don’t have to win the argument, as long as you come across as a reasonable person trying to enjoy your game-time in a drama free environment.  While it may seem hard to pull off when you are *ahem* instigating the discussion in the first place, just remember to keep your language above-board, your responses to the material and not as direct attacks, and for the love of God, don’t throw a hissy and log off or you will be seen as the major problem, not the asshat who wears your guild tag.

Get to Know Them

It’s amazing what knowing a bit about someone will do for your perspective of them.  Let’s take our previous examples with a little dash of personal information.

Cup-size gal: Had a mastectomy and is learning about the world of prosthetic breasts.  She even found out they have fake nipples!  Talking about the aggravation of her new “boobs” helps her be comfortable with her new body.

The Raid Leaver: Had a bypass last year and takes his blood pressure five zillion times a day to prevent a relapse.  When his blood pressure sky-rockets during stressful encounters, he notifies the Higher Authorities and drops raid ASAP.

The Dueler: Although he doesn’t say, you suspect he may have ADD.  He loves everything, is happy as a clam, but has the attention span of a gnat.  Apparently, the only thing he enjoys in-game is duels because he can keep seated and focused for that length of time.  BG’s and raids, while they sound fun, are just toooooo long.  It took you 2 hours, and three whispers to get this much information.

The Know-It-All: Brand spanking new and is in their first ever guild. Throws out pronouncements in the hopes that 1) You will accept the they are competent; 2) If they’re dead wrong, at least someone will hopefully correct them; 3) To appear to be a seasoned player.  After the first month, the behavior magically disappears.

The Boaster: This guy is freaking HILARIOUS.  Who the hell knew?  Apparently the talk about Swahili is an old joke from an old guild.  Can’t believe I never talked to this guy before *boggled mind*

While not every person you meet will be worth, you know, meeting, sometimes, if you can just get past the annoying behavior, you’ll find that there is a person worth knowing.


Not every guild is right for every person, and the people in your guild make a huge impact on your enjoyment of the game.  If someone is being such a fly in the ointment that you are considering any of the “meaner” options listed here, then you may want to re-evaluate how much you really love your guild.

Pro-tip: Staying in a guild for a single person, whether it be your significant other or your very best friend, when your time is being ruined by other people in the guild is a bad idea. If your friend or loved one cannot see that the guild environment is killing you, or you cannot have this discussion with them…. well, let’s just say, you’re trying to save yourself a hard discussion instead of taking steps to make sure you enjoy your game-time.

As the second part of that tip, if your enjoyment of your play-time is tainted by bad feelings, it will make you grouchy in your work, your non-WoW activities, and generally leave you with a bad feeling about WoW.  Preserve your fun time!  Find a better guild-home!


11 thoughts on “Farking Icehole

  1. I only had to read the first few bullet points, nay just the very first one and this blog post had me sold. This is an excelletn read, well thought out and very informative. Keep up the great work!

  2. I generally get along with my fellow guild members – especially since at the moment we're a small guild doing 10-mans. When we were bigger there were of course the odd person here and there that you didn't quite get along with, but politely ignoring them (without actually doing /ignore) works wonders. Just don't bother reading what they're writing unless it's something that you need to know 😛

    I had a warrior in a PUG raid last night that had an addon that told whenever someone was missing a buff. And he'd complain about this that and the other. And reminding me to put up Vigilance (tbh I'm lazy and I generally don't put it up on trash since I like to put it on someone likely to pull aggro -which varies so much on trash.. but admittedly it's really just me being lazy..). And complaining about people not using flasks/elixirs.. it was the first 4 bosses in ICC.. 15% buff.. flasks are kind of irrelevant at that point.

    I'm sure he's a really nice guy – but the constant whispers and raid comments were kind of annoying.

    When it comes to my own guild I will admit to having mixed feelings. I like them as people when chatting on vent – but at the moment I really dislike them as raiders. They've all started slacking and I even have one who's openly admitted that if he feels like watching a movie instead of raiding – he will damn well go watch a movie. Despite being a healer and we'd have to actually PUG someone instead. That kind of behaviour makes me so angry. And disappointed. And many other things.

    • It's so hard to love your guild-mates when they're not, ya know, being the guild-mates you signed on with. However, having recently been the person who needed a few months of slacking on the raiding scene, I'm definitely glad I enjoyed a FUN guild over a PROGRESSION guild.

      I generally manage to not /ignore people in guild chat, but I find that muting people on Ventrilo really helps me keep my sanity. Something about listening to an annoying twit just really drags me down. However, we do have a new guy who thinks we need to know about his sexual exploits, and he's about to hit the permanent /ignore.

    • Random jerks don't get two seconds of my time, but I DO try to get along with my guild-mates.

  3. I keep running into "needy" folk, and attention whores. And a few good folks. but, they are all kind of mixed together in a couple guilds I've been in.

    I generally just ignore (not /ignore, just not pay attention) so things donn't bug me too much. Granted, I know far more about some folks than I care to, but such is life…

  4. @ Saga

    I honestly believe there is a time and a place for add ons like that. Sure a raid leader can have an add on that tells him about peoples buffs etc, that's helping him do his job if the guild is strict/hardcore etc like that. But no on a random dude who's there/member. Also i hate questing add ons that tell people what you've done quest wise, or add ons that simply fill your screen up with spam. 😦

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  6. Sometimes too, they start off awful (rather than being OK but you didn't know them well enough), but being in the guild and being around people who aren't awful, starts to rub off on them. The younger guys in particular, over time seem to modify the way they talk and behave to mimic the way the older guys do it, particularly the officers and GM. As long as you're not stuck in a guild with a preponderance of asshat older guys . . .

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